Everything has a Reason...

This blog is all about everything.
This day... it seems like the statement "everything has a reason" has been my tag line.

First, because of an acquaintance who is begging for my help about his very complicated life... Well, he's always been asking for help (ever since I knew him) and right now.. I felt like, I'm tired helping him because I can see no improvement in him as a person. I keep reminding him to keep in mind all the advices I gave him but it's no use at all. Right now... I don't really know if I still should help him or what... all I know is that I don't want to but everyone's saying that I SHOULD HELP HIM. I just don't know why but it seems like everyone entrust him to me and it's a little irritating and a little amusing. He's not my brother or my father. Not a distant relative and not even my boyfriend but they still believe that I can help him.

Second, I realized that all the things that are happening right now will have a good result. I may be suffering right now but who knows maybe it's for my own good in the future. Also, I realized that sometimes... the results of our sufferings may not only benefit us but others as well. Just like Ikeuchi Aya . She suffered but in the end... she had helped a lot of people to realize the importance of life and the importance of love (A/N *author's note*: I LOVE HARUTO).

And lastly, I have heard a song entitled now. This is the chorus part:

There's a reason
Why we love each other now
And we don't know if this is forever.

There's a reason
Why we are together now
And we don't care if it's not forever now.

It made me realize that the most important thing in life is the present... not the future and definitely not the past.

Thank you Aya Kitou

After watching the drama series, one litre of tears... I was really inspired to do something that can help those people diagnosed with spinocerebellar degeneration disease. Thankfully, our Investigatory Project came up and I suggested to our group that we should do something related to 'SCD' since we're all interested with the drama series (The boys aren't really interested with the plot... they're interested with erika sawajiri haha).
Now... our experiment will be a new technology that will be able to help the people with spinocerebellar degeneration. It's a little hard but we'll try our very best to make it. We want to be light to SCD patients. We want them to know that as they continue fighting, there are people who will always be supporting them, loving them and fighting with them even though those people aren't always present at their side.
WISH US ALL THE BEST! JIA YOU! AJA! GOOD LUCK! FIGHTING! :) hehe

ichi rottoru no namida

1 litre of tears...

A fiction story based on a true to life story of a 15 year-old Japanese girl who was chosen to suffer from a disease called 'SPINOCEREBELLAR DEGENERATION'.
I just finished watching it a while ago.
It has 11 episodes and it took me less than 24 hours to finish it all.

The disease will cause you to lose control in your physical body because it is directly affecting the cerebellum which is responsible for the integration of sensory perception, coordination and motor control. If you have this disease, you will have difficulty in, walking, writng, speaking and eating. The progression of this disease varies from every individual that has it. As for the main lead in the series 1 litre of tears... the disease has a very fast progression. She is a very cheerful, optimistic and nice person that's why everyone was sad as she suffered in the last journey of her life. Many have asked... why her? why this disease? But up until now, no one could answer it.

As I watched the drama, there's no episode that failed to lead me crying my heart out. All the characters in the story has a pitiful story (not to mention, the actors/actresses are great). It will definitely move you to tears because it succeeded on me who seldom cries.

I also realized, I should be happy that I'm normal. I should be happy that I can still do the things normal people can. I should be happy because I can still write, walk, speak and eat.But many questions came up... why wasn't it me? why wasn't I the one chosen to have that disease? why am I alive until now? What's my purpose here?

Now, I definitely won't waste time (especially because I already know that not all people are given the chance to live the life they wanted to have). I will say what I want to say, I will do what I need to do and I will tell the people I love that I love them so and they will never be erased in my heart because I don't know what will happen in the future... maybe I'll also have an incurable disease.. or die from an accident or anything of that sort... I just don't want to regret in the end.

I LOVE YOU ALL !

MOM DISEASE !

Ever heard of that disease that will kill your brain slowly???
Well maybe I'm the first patient of it...
Take note... there's no cure... As long as you live, you'll have that.
It's actually worse than dying fast because of a certain disease.

*I know you know what that is already-- my so called "MOM DISEASE".

I am in a cold war with my mom these past few days and until now no one's surrendering. My dad told me, I should lower my pride and be the one to say sorry since I'm the child... BUT FUCK ! How can I when I didn't even do something wrong!?

She's a... (sorry for the word) BIATCH !
Now I know where my Bitchiness came from !

I just can't understand why she have that very high pride and a very hard heart and take note a very FUCKING INTENSE PERSONALITY !
You're lucky my mom wasn't your mom. There are times I'd ask myself... is she really my mom?
Oh GOD help me! AM I CURSED?
She always expect something great from me.
Sure, she'd help me achieve it BUT NO, she doesn't give me moral supports.
She's the first one who'd doubt me,
The first one to interrogate me,
The first one to pull me down
and the first one to ruin my dreams.

*just a thought*
I'm just happy I've met Ella and Wu Chun to replace all the sadness I feel because of having a 'DEMANDING MOM' like mine.

Now I understand why the teenagers feel like rebelling against their parents or either one of those !
SHIT... but I don't wanna do that... so I just blog what I feel since I have no choice ! (no one to tell my inner feelings)

My hater... She's just insecure...

It's normal for people to have what they so-call 'haters'...
especially if you're one of the most important people.

In school... I've managed to be one of those 'most important people'.
It's like the school wouldn't be complete without me...
I'm not bragging... (I just wanna share something that relates to that matter.)

Whoever said being one of those people is fun?
Whoever said it's fun to be important?
Whoever said it's cool to be known?
Whoever said it's nice to be famous?

...Whoever said those are CRAP !!! or maybe even... NUMB.

This particular girl in school basically HATES ME but technically... I don't know why.

I would never last a day not receiving some glares from her...
AND IT'S GETTING ON MY NERVES ALREADY!
but I can't fight back...
why?
because every person in our school has their eyes on me.
That's the problem in being famous.
Every word, every act, every step... it's known to everyone...
You can seldom express what you really feel.
You can never be YOU!

Now, the glares continue
and I'm planning to later on throw away my 'important person' title
and kick her ass off.

If you're one important person... BE WARE !

!!! BELATED HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELLA !!!

weeeee..... it's Ella Chen's 28th birthday yesterday :)
I'm so happy to be one of those people who have greeted her and gave her a message from the fangifts!

That girl...
is really a girl of simplicity and beauty.
She will stand out among the rest even without being 'girly'.

For me she's simply THE BEST!

I love her although people say she's a 'lesbian'...
I love her although she doesn't know me...
I love her very much
and now, she's a part of my everyday life...

It will hurt me is she leaves...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELLA CHEN !

***(ESPECIALLY FOR ELLA)***

Already STRESSED

Hi there !!!
As most of you know... the start of the school year in the Philippines is JUNE.

Whoever said that SCHOOL IS FUN is A HARD CORE LIAR.
Yeah I like to study, to read and to write but...
FUCK... I didn't expect the teachers to give students a lot,
and I mean A LOT, of works to do. DAMN IT!

BUT, there's a BIG BUT!
Being a special person in the school is cute.
People always talk to you.
Almost everyone knows you.
And you'll have haters -.-

I find my haters COOL.
haha.
I'm weird I know.
The reason is...
they are hating me even though they don't know me well.
Really!! they're nuts.
HATE THEM !
LOVE MY FRIENDS!
I LOVE SCHOOL!
I HATE THE SCHOOL WORKS!
haha. get me?

11 months ago...

I can clearly remember the day I met Wu Chun personally. It was eleven months ago, 12th of July 2008 but still, I remember it like it was just yesterday.

March 15 2008– The day when I first saw his handsome face. He will be starring on a drama (Hana Kimi) that will be aired soon on ABS-CBN that time. I was very stunned with him (and Ella Chen of course, but I will talk about Chunnie first this time). By that time… I thought it was just another ‘fad’ that I’ll be experiencing… never thought that it’ll last but then, it did. It was the turning point of my whole life.

That summer… I changed because of him. I learned a lot from him– from love to pains, from hardwork to success and everything. He gave me a reason to stand up because by then, I believe I’m at my worst. He saved me– Thank God He gave him to me. The whole April and May, I did nothing but think of a way to meet him (and Ella). I prayed so hard for a miracle to come. I decided just to work hard and achieve something worth rewarding so maybe, just maybe, meeting him would be my reward.

Then, the school year started. I was prepared to experience a lot of sufferings because I know.. what I’m asking for is worth everything. I was determined, focused and desired. Until one day, a friend of mine told me… he’ll be coming here. Just that one sentence from my friend made my whole world go crazy. I was anticipating for that day a long time ago and now that it came , I will never let go of it– whatever it takes.

Finally, July 12 2008, 3:30 pm.. we went to the PDA compound where he’ll be guesting. There was a long queue of people. It was raining while the sun is shining- literally- and it made me almost lose hope when I was so near at the entrance then the guards told us… fans can’t enter. My Gosh, it felt like heaven and earth came crashing on me. Then I thought… ‘this can’t be’. I know I did my best and I can’t have even just one CLOSE view of him without the TV screen as barriers. Then later, me and some other fans saw a van… instincts told us Chun was there so.. we rushed up. In front of the PBB house just a few meters away from us, Chun and Calvin sat waving at us… smiling at us… checking if we’re okay. For some fans, it’s enough but for me… it wasn’t…

I may sound like… I will never be contented but it’s not like that. I just feel that God allowed me to have a glimpse of Chun for a reason. I know that it’s a promise that if I do what I can… I will achieve what I want. Also, for me… it’s like an advance reward. He made it happen so I will not fail my promise.

Now, eleven months after… I’m still waiting for the time that I can have the chance to talk to him as a friend or even just as a fan to tell him how much I thank him for inspiring me and how much I love him for being su]ch a great person.

*** Wu Chun … I will meet you soon… with Ella Chen !

Jia You Irish !